Attraction doesn’t have an explicit definition. It comes in varied forms with the notion that we accept it as it appears regardless of our expectations or anticipation or even perhaps disappointment if that be the case.
Disappointment might be a curious suggestion when it comes to attraction. Still, it’s included because of the potential for attraction to bring people along that make us mad to be attracted to.
For instance, if you’re a woman of a particular age and grow to really like a man only to find that he’s a few years younger than you.
Normally as a strong, confident, and relatively successful lady, insecurities are not part of the repertoire, but society can be hugely influential when a couple makes their public appearances.
Whether we want to admit it or not, that does take a toll on confidence despite the level of confidence you might share as partners.
Hence working back to disappointment that can come with attraction when you get mad at yourself if you don’t take a moment to confirm whether a potential date is equal to or older in years before allowing the impending attraction.
But would interrogation of a potential partner and denial of your emotions be fair to anyone, especially yourself? Do what you perceive as society’s standards really play a significant part in your own values and beliefs?
Personal contentment and joy should always trump other people’s opinions. If you’re personally uncomfortable with the age difference because it somehow makes you feel bad about yourself, that’s different. But you need to weigh that carefully to see what’s true.
Tips for older woman dating a younger man
No one even blinks when they see a sophisticated man in advanced years with a 60-year old woman, not quite that age. When the shoe is on the other foot, people are afraid to blink for fear they’ll miss a stare at the elegant older woman on the arm of the man her junior.
It’s curious what the fascination is when the roles are reversed or why there’s more of a stigma that rests with the older lady than the older man when it would appear in most instances that the roles are really quite similar.
The draw of a younger person is not the number of years they’ve been on the planet. Men and women are attracted to vitality at any age. That will often draw the older age groups to the more youthful.
In contrast, young men find the poise, sophistication, and experiences or, perhaps maturity should be the term, of older women is desirable, preferring them often to their younger counterparts.
The women ranging in age from roughly 40 through to 70 prefer dating men who are much younger in years. It is further speculated that women ranging in their 50s enjoy men a decade younger. These partnerships tout as having the potential to last a lifetime.
The suggestion also exists that there are “third-world countries” in which it is believed that a mature woman in a relationship with a younger man is actually a symbol of good luck for the young man.
In all being foretold, both good and bad, what genuinely matters out of everything is the emotions the two people share and that each individual maintains a sense of self-worth and confidence in who they are as people.
You can’t give wholly of yourself to another person unless you value yourself. Let’s look at some interesting bits of facts and some advice for the older woman and the younger man.
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Facts and advice for older women and younger men
Everyone likes to offer different bits of advice and share facts when a relationship might be a bit unconventional, like perhaps an older woman and a younger guy.
Not everything you hear is accurate, nor should you pay attention to all that’s said. But some of the following could prove enlightening.
1. Sexually compatible
The indication is roughly between the age of 30 and 40; women reach their sexual peak while men will do so somewhere in their 20s. That speaks to the sexual compatibility of the younger man with the older woman.
Aside from raging hormones, the older woman offers the ability to create a discussion on varied topics engaging the young man with her poise and aptitude. So the relationship isn’t merely about sex.
2. Ease with finances
An older woman is likely situated in a thriving career. Many women today find themselves in successful positions with higher pay as the “wage gap” slowly begins to decrease between the genders and that “glass ceiling” starts to come down.
Not only is that a breakthrough in corporate America but there are breakthroughs on the homefront as mates are no longer concerned with who brings home the highest income.
When both head off to work, there’s stability in knowing the household finances are secure enough that it’s okay to buy the bigger home or the extra car or maybe even take the luxury vacation.
In heterosexual households where the mature woman is heading off to work, the younger man opts to be a stay-at-home dad, not feeling threatened by leaving the workforce and taking a position in the household.
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3. Consider the future instead of the novelty
You will face much insensitivity when people see you out and about as the “new couple,” whether there’s jealousy, ridicule, or just a lack of understanding.
It will make you try harder as a couple to keep the relationship strong and healthy, but the important thing is that you do that because you want the partnership to thrive into the future.
If you haven’t discussed the possibility of a future, you must take the time to do so because things with other people won’t calm down for some time.
There will always be that stranger unaware of your situation who mistakes you for a relative, perhaps an older sister, maybe the aunt, or, in a worst-case scenario, the mom.
Discussing these issues and how to handle them will help you decide if there is a future for you. Generally, when two people face adversity, it does bring them closer.
It just depends on how thick your skin is. It can be tough being called your mate’s mom and having to correct that person.
4. Learning from each other
In this younger man older woman relationship, each person can offer their partner so much as far as guidance. The older woman has experiences and knowledge that she can share to help her mate become mature and expand as a person.
The younger man has a modern edge and knows that the older woman might be behind the times. He can enlighten her on everything current, the trends, fashion, technology, and overall lifestyle.
They can thrive as a couple, learning and growing from each other. The goals they set have no bounds with the woman’s thought processes bringing her this far and the man’s innovative approach; their life together looks brilliant if they can maneuver past society’s critical eye.
5. The only downfall
The older woman and younger man’s relationship might have a few societal critics. But not worthy of this couple losing sight of each other. Too many statistics, counselors, and psychologists feel the couple has ideal dynamics that benefit the man and the woman.
Still, one downfall will destroy some of the older women and younger man couples; not all of them. It might not be an issue for some, but many will suffer the demise of starting a family.
Generally, the older woman has either had her children, and they’re grown or prefers not to have children and has taken steps to prevent the possibility or will agree. But won’t have comparable stamina to keep up with kids at this point in life.
Most young men won’t want kids immediately because they won’t be ready. But eventually, many men wish to start a family. The idea of that not being an option could be a dealbreaker in the relationship.
For the woman, the idea of having kids could be a dealbreaker in the relationship. This is a significant issue in any relationship. However, it is a major downfall for the older woman and younger man.
Out of all the advice for older women and younger men, the primary recommendation that matters more than any is to hold onto your sense of self-worth and individual confidence.
There might be a critical eye or a whisper, but as long as you hold onto that sense of value, you’ll have joy and contentment. Negativity can’t penetrate that.
Depending on your age, starting a family could definitely become an obstacle. The way to avoid that is only to see people you know are beyond that point if you know you want to avoid starting a new family at this stage in your life.
The best thing you can do with this relationship, or any really, is not to let poor influences in. You can listen to advice, but it doesn’t mean you have to take it. Not all advice means to help. I can speak to you from experience. I’m twice married to younger husbands.