Depending on the circumstances, it can be difficult to see a guy you have feelings for on a regular, everyday basis when those feelings are not mutual.
Whether it’s a crush that isn’t reciprocated or a mate that chose to end the partnership, it takes considerable discipline plus an incredible support system in the background in order to be able to cope, not to mention holding out hope that there is something more romantic and wonderful waiting down the road.
With adequate faith in the future, the heat of the emotion can maybe lessen to a degree despite the constant having to interact. But it’s virtually impossible to simply shut off feelings simply because the other person denies theirs.
Unfortunately, there’s no clear-cut or straightforward way to work through the agony of heartbreak that works universally for everyone as a group. Each person needs to handle the process uniquely and most often on their own, with there being no formula for determining a set time period.
Ideally, you would do so much faster without contact. But seeing the individual each day complicates grief and healing. Let’s look at a few tips other people have tried when faced with the same circumstances.
Getting over someone you see every day
It can be excruciating when you have feelings for someone who doesn’t return them, or perhaps they did but broke up with you. Even worse is if you need to be in constant contact with that person each day; it interferes with the grieving process disallowing for healing.
This is one of the reasons friends and family will discourage partnerships or crushes that start with people we know on an intimate basis, like neighbors, coworkers, classmates, or even close friends. The continued daily interaction magnifies the heartbreak that follows rejection.
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That doesn’t mean that you’ll never recover. A sound support system, perhaps third-party counseling, and a positive attitude regarding the future can help you cope with the emotions even when seeing the other person is entirely unavoidable.
Some tips that could potentially help in your attempts to get over the feelings for this mate include:
Try to avoid the chance meetings
It might be nearly impossible if the two of you are neighbors or coworkers, maybe go to the same college or even the same church. But it’s wise to look for a way not to see each other every day.
When there is a rejection, whether a crush doesn’t return the feelings or someone breaks up with you, it’s a devastating blow that needs to be healed. That can’t adequately happen if you’re constantly reminded of the rejection with daily interaction.
While that might mean moving, changing jobs, switching out your class schedule, or even attending a new church, these are things that people will do in an effort to work through what is essentially a grieving process or a heartbreak that comes with intense pain.
While you need to let yourself feel those feelings, you don’t need to be exposed to the source regularly. In fact, it’s recommended that when there is rejection, the other person is stripped from your life, so you have a complete period of time to heal.
No matter how drastic the circumstances, you’ll want to find a way that you won’t need to see the person regularly.
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Avoid conversations about the person
Other people will try to satisfy their need for gossip by trapping you into a conversation about the other individual with only the hopes of carrying tales back to that person. While you will likely want to speak ill of that individual, the higher road is always best taken.
Engage in a holiday
Take a break away from the day-to-day drudgery. If you know that there’s no way to rectify your regular interaction with the gentleman immediately, perhaps you can take a prolonged holiday to try to gain a new perspective.
Sometimes getting away to a new location strikes a hope for the future and can help lessen the intensity of feelings that the guy is not reciprocating.
While you might not be able to resolve the daily connection that the two of you continue to have at this very moment, the holiday will allow you to make plans for when you will be able to.
Developing a renewed excitement for things to come will give you something to focus on when the emotions are stirred by this man each day.
Practice mental discipline
There are a few ways you can accomplish mental discipline, but a professional counselor can guide you through various methods if you have trouble accomplishing the task.
One method is mindfulness or meditation. Some people have difficulty quieting their minds enough to be able to focus in the moment in order to practice either of these exercises. Soothing music, candles, or sometimes a guided session with a leader can help calm the mind.
Another method is journaling your feelings. If you’re not someone who enjoys writing lengthy content or putting thoughts onto paper, you can record your entries serving the same purpose, which is to help you deal with the emotions you’re experiencing.
Speaking with a support system is beneficial as well, but usually, this would need to be individuals not in your close social circle or family. It would be more helpful to seek out a support group or even speak with a therapist where you have no fear of judgment or personal opinions.
Become involved in self-care
When you’re attempting to lose feelings for someone you’ll be seeing regularly, it construes as rejection that they’re not returning the sentiment you’re exhibiting.
Because your self-esteem can take a severe hit, as can your confidence, you must retaliate by spoiling yourself in light of this sort of heartbreak.
Indulging in self-love and nurturing is vital when you feel rejected by anyone. Not only should you participate in a regular fitness regimen and healthy diet plan, plus enjoy soaking baths and intense massages. But you should also see a medical provider to ensure that your health is not suffering from the consequences.
Stress can be incredibly debilitating to the body and mind, affecting overall general health in numerous ways and potentially reacting in depression and anxiety in some instances.
If you haven’t had a wellness check, it’s a good idea to consult with your practitioner. Follow up to ensure you’re still doing well if you had your wellness.
If you believe you’re experiencing episodes of depression, express that to your medical provider, who can then refer you to an adequate mental health provider for a consultation and care plan.
Become a casual acquaintance
Decide to change your mindset when you interact with this mate on the daily. Just because you have feelings you’re attempting to recover from doesn’t mean you can’t switch that thought process to approach the guy differently.
Don’t be that person who has a crush or the person he broke up with. Allow yourself to pretend this individual is merely another casual acquaintance you need to contend with each day.
A mind is a powerful tool. When you take control of the situation, disallowing yourself to wallow in self-pity but, instead, look at it in a different light, it can prove to empower.
Once it feels like you have a better sense of control, that person no longer has power over you, and you can heal those unrequited feelings.
Can you get over a crush you see every day?
It’s tough to lose feelings for someone when you regularly see them. Ideally, when you have a crush on someone or lose someone to a breakup, you should avoid all contact in an effort to heal from the heartbreak, a problematic and exceptionally painful situation.
- Read on: Why does an ex keep contacting you?
When it’s a circumstance where the two of you are engaged in similar activities, whether work, church, school, or anything where you have to be together daily, the suggestion is that you move to a different position with any of these in order to come to a peaceful resolution.
That might seem drastic, but generally, the longer there’s exposure to someone who rejects you, the more difficult it becomes instead of easier. It’s wise to make a move early so healing can start sooner rather than later.
No one wants to develop feelings for another person only to have that individual reject them. But when you have these emotions plus the need to interact with the mate daily, that can be excruciating.
These feelings are not something anyone can merely stop. Letting go of emotion takes time, requires the support of nonjudgmental people and the ability to find hope for the future.
One of the best solutions, when caught in a situation where you need to interact with the person regularly, is to reach out for counseling since daily contact exacerbates what is already difficult. The professional can guide you through ways to cope with the heartbreak and how to handle the constant connection.